The Faithful Woman (Umm Sulaim)

(Keywords: True patience, true endurance, wisdom and good sense, children’s death, pious women, righteous women, wise women, Umm Suleim, Umm Sulaim, Anas Ibn Malik, Al-Rumaisa, Abu Talha, Paradise, Obedience to God)

    عن أنس ‏قال: ( ‏مَاتَ ابْنٌ ‏لِأَبِي طَلْحَةَ ‏مِنْ ‏أُمِّ سُلَيْمٍ، فقالت لأَهْلِها: لا تُحَدِّثُوا أبا طَلْحَةَ ‏بِابْنِهِ حَتَّى أَكُونَ أنا أُحَدِّثُهُ، قال: فَجَاءَ فَقَرَّبَتْ إِلَيْهِ عَشَاءً فَأَكَلَ وَشَرِبَ فقالَ: ثُمَّ تَصَنَّعَتْ لَهُ أَحْسَنَ مَا كَانَ ‏تَصَنَّعُ قَبْلَ ذَلِكَ فَوَقَعَ بِهَا، فَلَمَّا رَأَتْ أَنَّهُ قَدْ شَبِعَ وَأَصَابَ مِنْهَا قالت: يا ‏أَبا طَلْحَةَ ‏أَرَأَيْتَ لَوْ أَنَّ قَوْمًا أَعَارُوا عَارِيَتَهُمْ أَهْلَ بَيْتٍ فَطَلَبُوا عَارِيَتَهُمْ أَلَهُمْ أَنْ يَمْنَعُوهُمْ؟ قال: لا، قالتْ: فَاحْتَسِبْ ابْنَكَ، قال فغضِبَ وقال: تَرَكْتِنِي حَتَّى تَلَطَّخْتُ ثُمَّ أَخْبَرْتِنِي بِابْنِي، فانْطَلَقَ حتى أتى رسولَ اللَّهِ ‏صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم ‏‏فَأَخْبَرَهُ بِمَا كانَ، فقال رسولُ اللَّهِ ‏صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم: « ‏‏بَارَكَ اللَّهُ لَكُمَا فِي غَابِرِ لَيْلَتِكُمَا»)الحديث.  رواه البخاري ومسلم.

 وفي رواية عن أنس ‏قال: (‏ اشْتَكَى ابْنٌ لأبي طَلْحَةَ ‏فَخَرَجَ ‏أبو طلحة ‏إلى المسجدِ فَتُوُفِّيَ الغلامُ، فَهَيَّأَتْ أُمُّ سُلَيْمٍ المَيِّتَ وقالت لأهلها: لا يُخْبِرَنَّ أَحَدٌ منكم ‏‏أبا طلحة ‏بوفاة ابنه، فرجع إلى أهله ومعه ناسٌ من أهل المسجد من أصحابه، قال: ما فعل الغلام؟ قالت: خَيْرٌ مِمَّا كان، فَقَرَّبَتْ إليهم عشاءهم فَتَعَشَّوْا وخرج القومُ، وقامت المرأةُ إلى ما تقوم إليه المرأةُ فلما كان آخرُ الليل قالت: يا ‏أبا طلحة، أَلَمْ تَرَ إِلَى آلِ فُلَانٍ اسْتَعَارُوا ‏عَارِيَةً ‏ ‏فَتَمَتَّعُوا بِهَا فَلَمَّا طُلِبَتْ كَأَنَّهُمْ كَرِهُوا ذَاكَ؟ قال: ما أَنْصَفُوا، قالت: فَإِنَّ ابْنَكَ كَانَ ‏عَارِيَةً ‏مِنَ اللهِ تبارك وتعالى وإنَّ اللَّهَ قَبَضَهُ، ‏فَاسْتَرْجَعَ وحَمِدَ اللهَ، فلما أصبح غَدَا على رسولِ الله ‏صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم فلما رَآهُ قال: « بَارَكَ اللَّهُ لَكُمَا فِي لَيْلَتِكُمَا». فَحَمَلَتْ ‏بِعَبْدِ اللَّهِ). الحديث.  رواه  أحمد. ـ

 قال عباية بن رفاعة: ( فلقد رأيت لذلك الغلام سبع بنين كلهم قد ختم القرآن). ـ

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Narrated Anas -Ibn Malik may God be pleased with him- said:

A son of Abu Talha who was born of Umm Sulaim died.  Umm Sulaim [The deceased child’s mother] said to the members of her family: ‘Do not inform Abu Talha about his son until I do so.’

Abu Talha came home.  She presented supper to him, and he ate and drank (water).  She then bedecked herself best like she did not do before, and he (Abu Talha) slept with her (shared bed with her). 

When she saw that he was full and had slept with her, she said: ‘O Abu Talha, if some people borrow something from another family and then they asked for its return, could they resist its return?’  He said: ‘No.’ She said: ‘Then seek the reward of the death of your son.’  He was annoyed, and said: ‘You did not inform me until I had slept with you and then you told me about my son.’

Abu Talha went to Prophet Muhammad -prayer and peace be upon him- and informed him about what happened.  Thereupon Prophet Muhammad -prayer and peace be upon him-said: ‘May God bless you both in the night you spent together. ”The complete hadeeth.  Related by Al-Bukhari, and Imam Muslim.

And in another narration by Imam Ahmad: Narrated Anas -Ibn Malik may God be pleased with him- said:

A son of Abu Talha became ill.  Abu Talha went to the Mosque and the young boy died.  Umm Sulaim prepared the dead boy (washed and shrouded him) and said to her family: ‘Let none of you tell Abu Talha about the death of his son.’

Abu Talha came back home with some friends from the mosque.  He asked: ‘How is the young boy?’  She replied: ‘He is better than before.’  She presented their supper to them, they ate and then the group of people left.  She embellished herself like women do.  At the end of the night she said: ‘O Abu Talha, haven’t you seen the family of so and so who had borrowed something and enjoyed it, but when they were asked for the return of the loaned item they hated it?’  He replied: ‘They were not just.’  She said: ‘Then your son was a loan from God -the Exalted, and God has taken him.’  Abu Talha said: Inna li Allah wa inna ileihi raji’oon (To God we belong, and to Him we shall return), and he praised God.

When it was morning, Abu Talha went to Prophet Muhammad -prayer and peace be upon him- (and told him).  Upon seeing him the Prophet -prayer and peace be upon him- said: ‘May God bless both of you in your night.’  (As a result of blessing) Umm Sulaim became pregnant with Abdul-Allah.”

 

Obayah Ibn Rufa’ah said: “Afterwards I saw seven sons of that young boy, all of them had memorized the Qur’an.”

 


 

‏ أُمُّ سُلَيْم: هي الرميصاء امرأة أبي طلحة وأم أنس بن مالك رضي الله عنهم. وكانت قد رضيت بالزواج بأبي طلحة بشرط أن يسلم. فحملت فولدت غلاما صبيحا فكان أبو طلحة يحبه حبا شديدا، وهو أبو عمير. ـ

قال الإمام انووي: ( وفي هذا الحديث مناقب لأم سليم رضي الله عنها من عظيم صبرها، وحسن رضاها بقضاء الله تعالى، وجزالة عقلها في إخفائها موته على أبيه في أول الليل ليبيت مستريحا بلا حزن، ثم عشته وتعشت، ثم تصنعت له، وعرضت له بإصابته فأصابها .  وفيه استعمال المعاريض عند الحاجة وشرط المعاريض المباحة ألا يضيع بها حق أحد والله أعلم .  ثم دعا صلى الله عليه وسلم لهما بالبركة في ليلتهما، فاستجاب الله تعالى ذلك الدعاء، وحملت بعبد الله بن أبي طلحة، وجاء من أولاد عبد الله إسحاق وإخوته التسعة صالحين علماء رضي الله عنهم). ـ

 

Umm Sulaim:  

Her Name is Al-Rumaisa’ (and it is said Al-Ghumaisa’), and she is the wife of Abu Talha and the mother of Anas Ibn Malik -may God be pleased with them. 

When Abu Talha proposed to her she accepted his proposal with the condition that he would embrace Islam, and he did so.  She became pregnant and gave birth to a bright boy, whom Abu Talha used to love very much, and whose name was Abu Omair (but who later died in childhood).

The Scholar Al-Nawawi said:

“This hadeeth shows the virtues of Umm Sulaim -may God be pleased with her. 

It shows Umm Sulaim’s great patience and her acceptance of the destiny of God -the Exalted.

It also shows her wisdom and great sense in hiding their son’s death from his father at the beginning of the night so that he could spend the night without worry.  She then presented supper to him, ate her supper, and then bedecked herself and invited him, so he slept with her.

The hadeeth also shows that it is permissible to use pun [when she said ‘He is better than before’ which meant he was dead], on the condition that it does not violate the right of any Muslim.

Prophet Muhammad -prayer and peace be upon him- then prayed God to bless their night together.  So God accepted the supplication of the Prophet -prayer and peace be upon him, and Umm Sulaim became pregnant and then gave birth to Abdul-Allah Ibn Talha, who then fathered ten righteous and scholarly sons including Abdul-Allah Ibn Is-haq).”

 

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The Dutiful and Devoted Wife

(Keywords: Success in Marriage, Happy marriage, contentment and satisfaction, faithful wife, devoted wife, wife’s duties, wife’s role, pious women, righteous women, Paradise, Obedience to God)

 

        عن عبد الرحمن بن عوف رضي الله عنه، قال: قال رسولُ الله صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم: « إِذا صَلَّتِ المَرْأَةُ خَمْسَهَا، وصَامَتْ شَهْرَها، وحَفِظَتْ فَرْجَهَا، وأَطَاعَتْ زَوْجَها، قِيلَ لَها: ادْخُلِي الجَنَّةَ مِنْ أَيَّ أَبْوَابِ الجَنَّةِ شِئْتِ» .  رواه أحمد والطبراني. ـ

   Narrated Abdul-Rahman Ibn ‘Awf -may God be pleased with him- that that God’s Messenger -prayer and peace be upon him- said:  

If the woman prayed her five daily prayers, fasted her month (of Ramadan), guarded her private parts, and obeyed her husband, it would be said to her: Enter Paradise from whichever door of Paradise you wish.”  Related by Ahmad and Al-Teberani.

 


  

    وعن أسماءَ بنتِ يزيدَ الأنصاريةِ: ( أنها أتَتِ النبيَّ صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم وهو بينَ أصحابِهِ فقالت: بأبي أنت وأمي، إنِّي وَافِدَةُ النساء إليك، واعلم – نفسي لك الفداء- أنه ما من امرأةٍ كائنةٍ في شرقٍ ولا غربٍ سمِعَتْ بمَخْرَجي هذا إلا وهي على مثلِ رأيي: إن الله بعثكَ بالحقِّ إلى الرجالِ والنساءِ، فآمنَّا بِكَ وبإلهك الذي أرسَلك، وإنا معشرَ النساءِ محصوراتٌ مقصوراتٌ، قواعدُ بُيُوتِكم، ومَقْضَى شَهَوَاتِكًم، وحاملاتُ أولادِكم، وإنَّكم معاشرَ الرجالِ فُضِّلْتُمْ علينا بالجمعةِ والجماعاتِ، وعيادةِ المرضى، وشهودِ الجنائزِ، والحجَّ بعدَ الحجِّ، وأفضلَ من ذلك الجهادِ في سبيل الله، وإنِّ الرجلَ منكم إذا خَرَجَ حاجّاً أو معتمَراً أو مرابطاً، حَفِظْنا لكم أموالَكُم، وغَزَلْنا لكم أثوابَكُم، وربَّيْنا لكم أولادَكم، فما نشارِكُكم في الأجْرِ يا رسولَ الله؟  فالتفتَ النبيُّ صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم إلى أصحابِهِ بوَجْهِهِ كله ثم قال: « هل سَمِعْتُم مقالَةَ امرأةٍ قَطُّ أحسنَ من مُساءلتِها في أمرِ دينِها من هذه؟» فقالوا: يا رسولَ الله، ما ظَنَنَّا أن امرأةً تَهْتَدِي إلى مثلِ هذا. فالتفتَ النبيُّ صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم إليها ثم قال لها: « انْصَرِفِي أيتُها المرأةُ وأعْلِمي من خلفَكِ من النساء أن حُسْنَ تَبَعُّلِ إحداكُنَّ لزوجِها، وطلبَها مَرْضَاتَهُ، واتِّباعَها موافقتَهُ، يَعْدِلُ ذلكَ كلَّهُ». فأدبرت المرأةُ وهي تُهَلِّلُ وتُكَبِّرُ استبشاراً) . رواه البزار والطبراني والبيهقي في شعب الإيمان واللفظ له. ـ

 

Narrated Asma’ Bint Yezeed Al-Ansariyyeh that she went to Prophet Muhammad -prayer and peace be upon him- while he was among his companions and said:

O Messenger of God, may my father and mother be sacrificed for you.  I have come to you, may I be sacrificed for you, on behalf of all Muslim women, whether in the east or west.  Verily, God has sent you as a messenger with the truth to both men and women.  So we have believed in you (as a true messenger) and in God Who has sent you.  And we, the womenfolk, are confined, restricted, and keep in your homes. We are your source of physical pleasure, and bear your children.  While you, the group of men, have been favored over us with attending the Friday prayer and the congregational prayer (in the mosques), visiting the sick, attending funerals, performing Hajj (pilgrimage) repeatedly, and with what is better than that: fighting in the path of God.  And when a man among you goes out for Hajj, or Umrah, or fighting, we, the womenfolk, look after your property, weave your clothing, and raise your children.  Shall we not share in your reward, O Messenger of God?

The Prophet -prayer and peace be upon him- turned to his Companions fully and said: “Have you ever heard a better statement by a woman asking about the matters of her faith than this one?”  The companions replied: “O Messenger of God, we would not have thought that a woman would be guided to such as this.”

Then the Prophet -prayer and peace be upon him- turned to her and said:

Go back O lady, and inform the other women, that indeed a woman’s perfect treatment and obedience of her husband, her seeking his pleasure, and her doing what he likes is the equivalent (in reward) to all of that.”

Asma’ left exclaiming La ilaha illa Allah and glorifying God, hoping and rejoicing in the reward.  Related by Al-Bazzar, Al-Tabarani, and Al-Beihaqi in his book “Shu’ab Al-Iman”.

 

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Umm Ayman, Baraka

Editor’s note: Muslim societies today are not free from the sickness of racism. The following post introduces a little known character of Islamic history, whose position in the nascent Muslim community serves as a model for race relations in our contemporary society.

Among the early Muslim women of African origin was Umm Ayman.  She was the nanny of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ and took care of him from the time of his birth. The Prophet ﷺ in turn loved her and was very kind to her.  Indeed, he used to praise her in front of his Companions.  It is narrated that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: ‘Whoever desires to wed a woman from Paradise, then let him marry Umm Ayman.’  So Zayd bin Haritha married Umm Ayman and she bore him a son, Usama bin Zayd. (Related by Ibn Sa’d.)  And what greater honor is there than being a woman of Paradise!

When Usama bin Zayd was born, the Prophet ﷺ used to love him so much that he was known as ‘the Beloved of the Prophet’!  No wonder, for his father was Zayd bin Haritha, who was so loved by the Prophet ﷺ that he adopted him, until the command was revealed in Qur’an to attribute everyone to their father. And Usama’s mother was Umm Ayman, who was greatly respected and treated as a second mother by the Prophet ﷺ.  We can see this love in the following authentic narration:

وعن عبدِ اللَّهِ بنِ عمرَ رضي اللَّهُ عنهما، قال: ( بَعَثَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم بَعْثًا، وَأَمَّرَ عليهِم أُسامةَ بنَ زيدٍ فَطَعَنَ بعضُ النَّاسِ في إمارَتِهِ، فقالَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم: « أَنْ تَطْعُنُوا فِي إِمَارَتِهِ فَقَدْ كُنْتُمْ تَطْعُنُونَ فِي إِمَارَةِ أَبِيهِ مِنْ قَبْلُ، وَايْمُ اللَّهِ إِنْ كَانَ لَخَلِيقًا لِلْإِمَارَةِ وَإِنْ كَانَ لَمِنْ أَحَبِّ النَّاسِ إِلَيَّ، وَإِنَّ هَذَا لَمِنْ أَحَبِّ النَّاسِ إِلَيَّ بَعْدَهُ» .  رواه البخاري ومسلم.

Narrated ‘Abd Allah bin ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him and his father):

“The Prophet ﷺ sent an army and appointed Usama bin Zayd as their commander. When some people criticized Usama’s leadership, the Prophet ﷺ said: ‘If you are criticizing Usama’s leadership, then you used to criticize his father’s leadership before. By Allah, he (Zayd) was worthy of leadership and was one of the most beloved persons to me, and now this (i.e. his son, Usama) is among the most beloved to me”  (Bukhari and Muslim).

From Umm Ayman and her family, we see that Islam gives equal status to everyone, and people excel one another by nothing but piety and righteousness.  Indeed, discrimination based on color, race, or gender has no place in Islam.

عن أبي هريرة رضي الله عنه أن رسولَ الله صَلّى اللهُ عليهِ وسلَّم قال: « المُسْلِمُ أخُو المُسْلِمِ: لا يَظْلِمُهُ، ولا يَخْذُلُهُ ولا يَحْقِرُهُ، التَّقْوَى ههُنَا، التَّقْوَى ههُنَا، ويُشِيرُ إلى صَدْرِهِ، بِحْسبِ امْرِيءٍ مِنَ الشَّرِّ أَنْ يَحْقِرَ أَخَاهُ المُسْلِمَ، كُلُّ المُسْلِمِ عَلَى المُسْلِمِ حَرَامٌ: دَمُهُ، وعِرْضُهُ، ومَالُهُ، إنَّ اللَّهَ لا يَنْظُرُ إلَى أجْسَادِكُمْ، وَلا إلَى صُوَرِكُمْ، وأَعْمَالِكُمْ، ولكِنْ يَنْظُرُإلَى قُلُوبِكُمْ».  رواه البخاري ومسلم.

 

Narrated Abu Hurayra (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet ﷺ said:

“A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim. He neither oppresses him, nor humiliates him, nor looks down upon him.  Piety is here (and while saying so he pointed towards his chest).  It is a serious evil for a Muslim that he should look down upon his brother Muslim.  All things of a Muslim are prohibited for his brother in faith: his blood, his wealth, and his honor. Verily Allah does not look to your bodies nor to your faces and actions but He looks to your hearts.”  (Bukhari and Muslim).

It is well-known that Bilal, the freed African slave, had great status with the Prophet ﷺ.  And now we learn about Umm Ayman, the African nursemaid of the Prophet ﷺ, who had a similar high regard and status with the Prophet ﷺ. Suffice it to say, these examples serve as important lessons for us today in our interaction with others.